Friday, December 3rd, 2004
|
|
5:00 am
|
|
dude, i fucking hate the internet...im out of here! love you. bye. <3
|
|
|
|
Sunday, November 28th, 2004
|
|
6:36 pm
|
chip and i didnt do our thing last night...it always works out that way...but instead, i saw richard...very happy about that...we start some rukus at this dudes house...something disturbed us about chuck throwing himself a party after hes the reason my friend is in the dirt...what is there to celebrate? it was raining all night so we didnt do too much...it was fun
im back in westminster....its so nice to be home alone! some peace and quiet
( pictures from my break! )
|
|
|
|
Thursday, November 25th, 2004
|
|
10:41 pm
|
when ur friends die...everything just seems so wrong
i feel like i am at the greatest loss ive felt in so long
im angry..im sad..im feeling emotion that i havnt felt in so long
i cry but it just doesnt help
i dont know why i read the newspaper article...sometimes you just need something make it real
"Kent Island, Grasonville, and Queenstown volunteer fire departments, Queen Anne's County paramedics, and the Maryland State Police responded to the crash. The driver and passenger had to be removed from the car.
The driver, who was not identified, had multiple traumatic injuries, police said. He was taken by state police helicopter to the University of Maryland Shock Trauma Center in Baltimore. Police said he was in stable condition about 11 p.m. Friday.
The passenger, James Elwood Timms III of Main Street, Queenstown, was pronounced dead at the scene. Police said he suffered severe head and chest trauma."
current mood:  sad
|
|
|
|
|
6:27 pm
|
my silly boy spent the night in jail...bummer...he had 10 cell mates...i dont wanna know the details of his night...he was photographing cops beating 2 guys...not the brightest idea
yum turkey was good
im going to the movies with the lovely sisters
bye everyone
|
|
|
|
Wednesday, November 24th, 2004
|
|
10:11 pm
|
being home has its ups and downs...im thrilled to be around my sisters...sleeping last night was a bit much...i shared my bed with 3 others...most importantly my sister, then of course my dogs suzie and elmer...just made me think of the last person i shared my bed with :( my dad took me and sarah out for a greek dinner...i ate italian...meh food is food to me...i had the same thing i had when she took me out to dinner...so many things remind you...stefs boyfriend went spastic tonight...its a scary thing...he broke up with her...and honestly, im glad to see it...she needs someone with less baggage...to treat her well...shes an awesome gal...matt #2 went to comfort her...hes amazing like that...i didnt hang out w/ chip today like planned...i was afraid to call him all day cuz i knew he'd be sleeping...i suck...this whole situation is just farthest from my mind lately...so much has come up...so much is unsettled...family time tomorrow...24 family members to be exact...thats a bit much...but i hope to have a good time and to get some smiles in...break has been nice..and my mom quit her job...im happy for her
goodnight, i must run away with tyler now for the evening
i got my CAMERA back today! its been 7 months...even if its not mine, and she got a knew one to replace it...who cares...the fact is that i can take pictures again of all my lovely peoples
|
|
|
|
Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
|
|
11:53 am
|
i shall return to this internet land on sunday
tata
|
|
|
|
Monday, November 22nd, 2004
|
|
2:23 pm
|
i think hanging out with matt is bringing me down lately...he likes to talk about his feelings which is good for him to get them out but its always about his ex...and so at the same time, we are both going thru this grieving stage and he seems to be a constant reminder to me of my situation...i couldnt sleep last night very well because i had this all on my mind...and how it used to be so easy to just call her before i go to bed and then sleep was no problem...but then it just makes matters even worse knowing that this is no longer and option and that shes very bitter towards me now...friendship seems so far away...and end to this seems even farther...
my senior presentation went well for the most part...only a few problems that he laid into me about in front of the class...thats the worst part, knowing youre almost to the end and that you have to stand up there and get critiqued...it was good, and im pleased with my performance...2 more classes to go and then break...much needed break...see my family and get my head clear...maybe some of these feelings will go away
biology time
|
|
|
|
|
1:13 am
|
tonight was icky
kristen and i went to the library...it was fun not being alone...she made my night when she said
( kristen + me )
oh how kristen can make any homework assignment funny
btw, i love this:
"Some economists argue that the apparent paradox rests on an illusion: there is no real "labor shortage," only a shortage of people willing to work at the wages currently being offered. You might as well talk about a "Lexus shortage" -- which there is, in a sense, for anyone unwilling to pay $40,000 for a car."
im a reading maniac these days...i run across some of the best stuff...
im about to give up for the night on this so called homework...i wanna go read and fall asleep peacefully...i wanna feel better in the morning...keeping my fingers crossed....goodnight
|
|
|
|
Sunday, November 21st, 2004
|
|
8:04 pm
|
ive come down with a cold...sore throat thing...i just woke up from an hour nap...i couldnt sleep any longer cuz i felt too shitty..thats a pathetic situation
im so stressed now cuz of my presentation...im not done it...i feel like shit and cant focus...everything is so blah at this moment in time but i know its just a current dilema and that after tomorrow...everything will be back to normal...
and i might have something to look forward to this week...chip invite me over tuesday night to slumber with him...i hope he doesnt screw this one up...
today was fun at matt's house...jeffy came over too...ravens won...uh yippee?
im going out of town tuesday thru sunday...i hope no one forgets about me!! i will get to see my lovely sisters and my puppies! im excited
oh ya i got my hair dyed today too
|
|
|
|
|
2:19 am
|
boo to not being able to go to the zoo today with muh marcie...ashley and i went out to harry's cuz i wanted a boston creme pie..they didnt have any so i had a brownie sundae for lunch...it reminded me why i hate chocolate...matt #2 and i cooked dinner together...we made spaghetti...we are starting off easy and working our way up in the kitchen...jeffy was in town so he came over and the three of us watched shrek 2...matt's futon for a couch was really uncomfy so we left and went over to jeffy's parents house to play nintendo...madden 2005 to be exact...not really my thing...i just ate chips and laughed at them...matt's head started hurting really bad so we left jeffy's...he invited me back in so i took him up on the offer...got home a decent hour of 2 am...
tomorrow i have to make myself finish my senior seminar presentation..i'm going to do it over at matt's house like that is going to help any...but hes great company so what the heck...i wanted to see him get excited over the football game...he even wears his ravens jersey when he watches it...its nice to see people who are happy
where is my chip at tonight? im too lazy to call him even tho i know hes awake...hes a vampire..i hate calling during the day cuz i always wake him up...but its so damn cute when he says "dont appologize..i wouldnt have answered if i didnt want to talk to you"
ya so anyways...goodnight!
|
|
|
|
Tuesday, November 16th, 2004
|
|
8:54 pm
|
chip and i are staying up all night....he doesnt know what hes getting himself into...he made me lemon drops...love love love this boy
specialist tomorrow...and i made a new friend in hanover...we are gonna get some tea tomorrow and hes gonna let me play with his lassie dog
GRE is over...need to retake it....boo to that...i was 100 points off my goal...i can do this!
goodnight everyone
|
|
|
|
|
1:04 am
|
people are so lovely.
i talked to my sister, my mom and my dad today...they help me feel at ease...i love that my dad says "i love you" everytime we get off the phone...it makes me so happy everytime..and the fact that he believes in me...he doesnt think im capable of getting a bad grade on anything...oh my, family is so great
Ned invited me over tonight to watch tv....oh how evil tv is, i so dont miss it one bit...i lasted 30 mins...barely..futurama was on
im glad its tuesday...only a few hours till this test is over and done with...and for that i am happy
"you should come over to my white trash castle and cuddle with me in front of my best of beakmans world dvd" crushes are so grand
|
|
|
|
Monday, November 15th, 2004
|
|
4:41 pm
|
its been a hell of a day..im so NERVOUS
i slept for 1.5 hours last night.
my GRE TEST is tomorrow morning
No pressure, i mean it just may determine my chance of getting into Harvard. FUCK! im not even getting my hopes up about getting in...its so competitive...but i have a strategy of getting myself in...we'll see
i have butterflies in my stomache already. I pray that i at least get some sleep tonight. someone hold me! im a scared baby
|
|
|
|
|
12:57 am
|
HOLY FUCK IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW!!! <3333
|
|
|
|
Saturday, November 13th, 2004
|
|
1:39 am
|
|
note to self: listening to the new cure cd makes you cry because it reminds you of a certain plane ride, it reminds you of your ex, it makes you very sad. please discontinue use forever
|
|
|
|
Friday, November 12th, 2004
|
|
11:01 pm
|
"Cold blue lines ripple beneath your eyes; one for each hour they take away. Pampered creatures like myself sit in our deep burrows and love you for your grace. We envy you for your strength and orbit around the gravity of your deprivation. We stay up late at night to watch Kubrick films while you snatch every minute of sleep that you can. Sleepless children have no time for sweet distractions. I’ll admit that I am a listless, drowsy-headed boy that doesn’t know the time it takes to peel an orange. I’ve never taken a nap in the back seat of a car. I want to offer my condolences, my comfort to you in this short time we have. Our friendship is slipped in-between classes. I’m never sure how to open myself up to you, so I stay up late listening to Burroughs’ croaky toad voice on my headphones, hoping to open up a portal between the two of us, a tunnel we can crawl through on all fours and rub our noses together for warmth. I dream of goofing off in the multi-colored ball pool, laying on the cool, tough plastic of the wobbly water floor. I hope that one day we can share our dreams and sleep as much or as little as we like, exploring the wreckage and ruin of a thousand dead civilizations."
dont you love stumbling on things you probably weren't suppose to read? hehe <3
|
|
|
|
|
6:24 pm
|
we started fashion show practices...its fun..the girls are all nice and lovely
club sonar tonight perhaps...its so ugly outside...maybe being in the club will make me forget about the cold rainy day we've had...seeing everyone dressed all pretty...we arent scene, we are fashionable ;) and anyone who hates is just lacking their own creativity
i wanna get my hair cut soon...its cool now but it'll be even better when its cut
marks busy tonight..that makes me sad...hes in DC seeing pedro the lion..he fell asleep last night in my room..i had to kick him out and that made me sad
matt bought a wardrobe from IKEA today!!! hes so metrosexual now...he wont hang his pants tho...i'll change that! the wardrobe could fit both of our clothes in it hehe
tomorrow's after party is going to be weird...i dont know if im gonna go yet...i love all my friends that will be there...but the whole atmosphere is out of my league
time to go figure out my night
|
|
|
|
Saturday, November 6th, 2004
|
|
10:44 pm
|
ive been a big blob of depression for at least 3 weeks now...and as many might know..its gotten significantly bad this weekend...but you know..what i dont need is people cursing at me and getting mad at me for being a loner...i dont want people making feel obligated to talk...i mean if it was me trying to help someone..i'd offer them someone to talk to and not be like "for fucks sake say something" ya that really doesnt help..or person #2 "why the fuck dont you talk to someone?" i think my poster of robert smith on the wall is a better listener than most of the people that offer...he helps me study for my bio test...i teach him about what i need to know...yup...
im gonna go be lame some more in my pity..i ate a shit load of candy...i could eat more if i didnt eat it all...
i wish matt would get off work :(
|
|
|
|
Friday, November 5th, 2004
|
|
8:58 am
|
last night, mark and i met up with dave at the verizon store..it was a fucking riot...they have shitty customer service and we were there an hour to get a new phone...we went and go some food in the food court...i saw dave kimmel...what a douche hes turned out to be...we headed down to baltimore..alexisonfire was playing at the ottobar...with hot water music...it was fun i suppose...mark drove me home and i crashed...ya such an exciting day...its friday :) i might hang out with tim tonight..and tomorrow is the tattoo convention with dale, marcie and brett, and then im gonna go to matts house i think to do some photogrpahy stuff with flares or smoke bombs...it should turn out pretty cool
FUCK ITS FRIDAY!! im so happy
|
|
|
|
Tuesday, November 2nd, 2004
|
|
10:36 pm
|
today was fun..i went home to vote and matt tagged along...my vote canceled out my dads vote for bush...matt and i did some skating...i mostly watched cuz it was too painful...i strained my back some more...stupid! i am really stupid!...my mom and dad took us out to dinner...i had a big steak! and matt had a tiny salad b/c they didn't have very many veagan choices...im really really tired from so much stuff today...especially all the driving...i have a bio test tomorrow, i think going to sleep now and waking up earlier would be more beneficial than attempting to study right now...lately i havnt been sleeping well but tonight im feeling it...perhaps i wont be awake to find out who won...but in a sense i dont think i want to :( i hate bad news before bed...i really really really dont want bush to win...i almost think it might be a heart break if he does...when did i become so political..its scaring me...its suppose to be in the upper 50's to 60's all week....but i really wanna wear my new coat damnit! my coat is really hot! get cold out!
goodnight everyone and good luck Kerry
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
bybye_beautiful's journal